I realize today that: There are two strong forces inside of me.
One is pulling me down to the earth. I can feel that it is from my body. It is what my body desires. The body feels secure and certain only when it connects with its source: the earth.
The other one is pulling me up to the vast void. It is not yet strong as my body force. But it gets stronger everyday. I realize that it is what my life desires. The life wants to connect with its source; it wants to get rid of the bondage of the physicals; it wants to expand to the limitlessness; it wants to liberate itself.
And there is another interesting force, which is kinda floating between the two. Sometimes it is close to the earth; sometimes it flies to the sky. When I want to observe it, I notice that my eye balls are dragged by it up and down. Then my thoughts come here and there.
When I notice that thoughts come, I lock my eye balls and focus on Yin Tang (between eyebrows) . Then I can reconnect with the life force which is pulling me up.