During this morning’s meditation, I can sense that when I am in the state of true existence, I am in the expanding mode.
In that expanding mode, it’s not that my body expands (so was I told in the past about qigong state). It’s not my mind expands and reaches to the sky or outer space either. In the past I thought so I believed that my body and mind territory is expanding in that so called Qigong state. Now I realize that all that were my illusions. I was then my psychological being, thinking or dreaming or pretending or hallucinating…
I can sense it clearly today that when in the expanding mode, I as a life energy is connecting, reaching out, giving away, pouring out to the biggest and only one true existence.
I did some experiment this morning. Whenever I stop that expanding mode, I fall into a psychological being state in no time. In that psychological being state, I could feel that I was contracting. Everything happens within me was contracting. It’s a self preservation mode because of fear. Fear of losing self.
But self itself is just an illusion. No self would ever exist. It’s just a psychological concept, and so we hold on to that all the time. That is Not a true existence.